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| Three years ago today Tricia and I took a walk up a mountain in Japan and when we reached the top the path our lives would take changed.
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| Last January, Randy was laid off of his full-time job. We lost our income and benefits, which was hard, but the atmosphere of the job had begun to really turn a bit sour, so I wasn't surprised. I had been praying that he would get a new job, and be finished at that one by mid-January. Well, he was finished there by mid-January, but no new job had materialized.
For two and a half months, we were on unemployment. Our income was slightly more than half of what it had been, and yet we found that everything was paid and we had sufficient for clothing, food, and all our needs. My husband was not content to sit at home collecting benefits, so when a part time position came up next door at my dad's restaurant, he took it.
Unfortunately, this meant another drop in income. There were a few benefits - no gasoline was necessary for driving to work, and because he works as needed, our rent was proportionately lowered. To my amazement, we not only are surviving, but thriving in this position. I have continued to be thrilled with the way that God has provided.
At the same time, we hope this will be a temporary thing. Randy would like to return to working in radio/communications one of these days. He feels that he isn't providing as well for us as he'd like to. So when a part-time position came open at a nearby Christian school, he applied, and got an interview. I was excited, and began to anticipate that would be the way that God would provide for our little family and the next addition we are expecting.
A few days after the interview, he got a call letting him know that they chose another applicant for the position. When I found that out, I struggled hard with wondering why God let us down like that. Didn't he know that we really need extra income to pay for the expense of having a baby next spring? My discouragement and disappointment ran down my face in visible trails of tears.
But you know something? I started thinking back. When we were pregnant with Ray and our Japanese employers found out, we were sent back to America with no job, no insurance, and very little savings. We landed, found a place to live, and got a job with benefits in an amazing flurry of events. Our medical insurance kicked in a mere 2 or 3 weeks before Ray was due. We had been able to work in Japan JUST long enough to pay off some debts that made our expenses coming back reasonable.
Then when Randy was laid off. We had all we needed. Like the loaves and fishes, God took what we had, and made it enough. Still, as a family of three, now on a 25-30 hr. a week job, the little we have never has failed to be enough.
Now it is looking like we may have to move in order to find a job that offers medical insurance. I don't want to move. The thought of packing everything up when I'm either sick, or huge, is simply not a thought I relish. I love being near my family, sharing a garden with my sister, having babysitters I trust nearby. I would miss Tuesday girls' nights, and the church family here.
But God has never failed to provide. When I moved to Texas and knew no one, I was provided a second family, a job where my co-workers cared for me, a church where I was able to serve and be served. In Japan, I never felt a lack, despite not having many of the comforts of familiarity. God has provided.
So, even though this part-time job fell through, even though there is no guarantee that we will even find a job with benefits, even though we may have to move, even though we might have to continue to live on part-time income for a while . . . God does provide. I have no idea how it will happen. Sometimes life feels like a royal treasure hunt, where you never know where you'll find the next key. Sometimes you save for months for new tires for a car and in a day someone provides the money for them. Sometimes I hear people talk about their pay getting cut by more than our monthly income, and marvel at the way God stretches what we get. And sometimes when you need canning jars, you get a gift that allows you to get exactly what you need.
Most of all, I need to remember to seek his Kingdom first. That is when he promises that "all these things will be given to you." When I start to attach my hopes to a job possibility, or a savings account, or people I love, I lose sight of the one who has never failed me yet. But you know, praise the Lord, he has never failed me.
I struggle, even after all the evidence, to trust God. I'm just like those grouchy Israelites, who saw God provide time after time and still complained about where God had them. I hope that, in the end, I can be more like Joshua, choosing even in the face of what appeared to be impossible giants to believe that God can take us in to the land of promise if we but trust him. May I keep my eyes on God, and not those pesky giants inhabiting the land.
-Tricia
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| And I quote, "Next time we have a little extra - hopefully before winter hits - I want to take Ray to the Zoo. He loves ALL kinds of animals. In books, he stops and makes animal sounds when he sees ones he recognizes. His favorite birthday gift was his farm. When at grandma's, he looks for the cows first thing when he gets there. I can only imagine how much fun he would have, as long as we don't have a super-heated day, anyhow.
- Tricia"
Well, I just want to let whoever saw this and made sure we had "a little extra" know that we got it and are quite thankful. I'll be scheduling the zoo trip once our vacation (yay for frequent flier miles!) and family reunion weekend are over.
I can't wait to see how he reacts to the animals!
- Tricia (again)
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| First, a few pictures of the little guy and some of his favorite things. First, just one of him.
 I'm biased, but I think he's a real cutie. Here he is with his daddy.  And here he is doing one of his favorite things - reading books.  We have spent literal hours a day in the past week just reading books to the little guy. When we finish one, he says, "Done," hops off my (or daddy's) lap, gets another, then brings it and holds his arms out to be picked up and read to again. We've gone 4 or 5 books in a row. This bookworm momma is delighted. And this is one of Ray's favorite birthday gifts. It's a farm I picked up at a garage sale. It has several different animals and (if the switch is on) it makes noises when you put them in or take them out of their places in the barn.  Now for the cake. I try to be a responsible mom. Therefore, my son has really not had a lot of sweets. His main indulgence is ice cream from Grandpa's restaurant. Other than that, graham crackers are about as sweet as he's tried. But for that first birthday - every child need a cake! Here he is waiting patiently. He was told to "look!"  He was curious about the little "Happy Birthday" sign sticking up.  He's finally getting into the frosting a little . . .  See it all over those hands?  But then he really gets a taste of it. Hmm. He doesn't look too sure about that.  No question about it now. He does not like that sugary sweet flavor. Poor little birthday boy!  I may have one of the rarest types of children around. One who LIKES pickles (I ought to get a picture of that, I suppose) and doesn't like icing. He is a precious, sweet little guy. And he went to sleep within half an hour after he got his cake. I think the reason for the meltdown might have been that he was tired (though I also know he's not too overly fond of sugary stuff.) - Tricia | | |
| I was talking to another mom the other day, and she made a "confession" that I totally related with. So, for the fun of it, I thought I would jot down a few "confessions" I myself could make as well. These are the sorts of things that, while not terrible, do help me qualify for the "not quite perfect!" label.
- I do not dry my dishes. We don't have a dishwasher, and I figure it's enough work to keep up with washing them. So, once washed they sit in the drainer until dried and either used or put away. It makes the kitchen look more cluttered, but they air dry perfectly well with no harm done.
- I do not make my son wear socks and shoes in the summer. He dislikes them, and I don't see the point. Sure, we deal with a few occasional stubbed toes, and his feet get filthy, but it does not hurt him in the long run. I just wash his feet in the evening once we're inside for the day.
- I am not particularly fond of cloth diapering. I don't have a deep attachment to environmental causes. I am simply too cheap, and too stubborn to spend so much money on paper diapers for my son to wet and dirty and then throw away.
- My favorite stain remover is the sun. Hang clothes out on the line, and leave them for a while. There are very few stains it doesn't work on. Specially diapers. (And if it happened to rain, I have at times left them hang out until they dried. Some of them get rewashed . . . some of them don't.)
- I have been known to drop dishes, housekeeping, or whatever I "ought" to be doing to take Ray to the library, my mom's, or just next door for a treat from Grandpa. We have a lot of fun together.
- I don't mind when my son totally makes out with my face. He loves to give big, slobbery, open-mouth kisses, and sometimes he gets a few (literal) licks in. I think it's adorable, though a bit messy. Should I teach him to close his mouth when he kisses? Probably. But . . . oh well. There's time for that yet.
- I totally love the fact that Ray likes books. He knows that the one way to get momma's attention is to bring her a book, hold his arms open, and say, "Up." Works EVERY time. And I read them all the way through even if he's done listening. I've also read bible stories to him. From the Bible. Not that he gets it yet. But he's gonna know that book!
- My house is rarely "company ready." It can be, usually inside of an hour, but it isn't there at any given time.
- There are three - not one, or two, but three drawers that Ray is allowed to open and take things out of to play with in the kitchen. You can usually find said items scattered randomly throughout the house. Anything from those drawers gets rinsed before it is used - but the things go back in without getting washed. If you're not comfortable with that, my best advice is simply - don't eat the left-overs.
- I have been known to rapidly strip Ray down to his bare bottom and plop him on the potty when he starts grunting like he's going to make a BM. If I succeed (and I have) then I don't have to clean up the dirty diaper. I figure it can't hurt for him to get used to the idea of pooping on the potty, right?
- I totally do talk poopy diapers and "momma shop talk" with other moms.
- I find myself feeling annoyed with people who want to relegate breast-feeding moms to bedrooms, closets and bathrooms. I don't mind being modest, and withdrawing around a corner or not being out right in front in the open. But it's not a shameful thing, and I don't see the point in "hiding". Babies need to eat often, and just because there isn't a bedroom around doesn't mean mother and child have to be uncomfortable to fill babies tummy.
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